Pre-baby Abby was going to be the perfect Mum. She had it all figured out. Dummies would be avoided at all costs. If for some reason I broke, and caved in to using dummies, they would always be sterilised. I even bought a portable dummy steriliser, for on the run.
Then I became a Mum and all that went out the window. Baby got a dummy, and sterilising it consisted of putting it in my mouth to clean it, before giving it to her. Definitely not the perfect Mum, but one that’s doing okay, and a happy baby.
The dummy and sterilising thing was going mostly well. Miss E would spit the dummy on the floor, I’d pick it up, dust it off, pick the dog hair off, shove it in my mouth, then give it to her. If dropped outside, I gave it a rinse under the kitchen tap first.
Then she spat it out on the floor at the supermarket checkout one day.
I bent down and picked up the dummy, and saw the grime and grot from the hundreds of feet that had passed over the floor that day. I stood up, juggling baby, dummy and handbag at the checkout, thinking ‘Yeah, not putting that in my mouth!’ I held onto the dummy while I paid for my groceries, thinking that I would put it in my handbag afterwards.
But I forgot.
Back to the car. I did the ‘groceries in the boot, trolley back to the shop, baby out of trolley, baby in car’ juggle, all while holding the dummy in my hand. I strapped Miss E in the car and she started crying. I popped the dummy in her mouth, jumped in the car and started driving home.
Halfway home I realised, the dummy that dropped on the floor, so disgusting that I wouldn’t even put it in my mouth, was now in Miss E’s mouth.
My first Mother of the year moment.
Now we don’t take the dummy shopping anymore! Always learning 🙂